Home: Spiritual maturity is evident in a man’s own home life. An overseer is to be a good manager of his own household, because how he leads[1] his own family shows how he will take care of the church of God. Paul points out one area where this is readily seen: in his children.[2] The man has the respect and obedience of his children because he leads them with “all dignity,” a godliness that elicits respect,[3] not by intimidation and anger. He nurtures them with the discipline and instruction of the Lord (Eph. 6:4), wielding the rod as needed (Prov. 13:24; 22:15; 29:15) and teaching them the way of the Lord. It is in the home that he shows his true colors. His home life is a preview of his public life.

Church: Paul shifts from the language of leadership to that of care, because church leadership is more than maintaining order and discipline; it is about the care of souls. The church is a hospital for souls ravaged by sin.[4] There, lives are rehabilitated toward spiritual health and usefulness to the Lord. Her caretakers feed them the knowledge of God, guard them from sin, lead them toward biblical faithfulness, and model godliness for them.[5] The church needs leaders with the proven ability to care for souls (Heb. 13:17). Men must first prove themselves faithful in the “little church” of the home before serving as shepherds over the household of God. In the words of our Lord, “he who is faithful in a very little thing is faithful also in much” (Luke 16:10; cf. 19:17).

[1] “Manage” (proistēmi) is lit. “stand before” as the leader responsible for those under him (cf. 1 Tim. 5:17).

[2] The children’s submission is emphasized, though other aspects of his leadership are not excluded.

[3] “Dignity” (semnotēs) is seriousness that elicits respect, seen in a man’s godliness (“reverence” in NKJV).

[4] “Take care” (epimeleomai) is used of the Samaritan’s rehabilitative care for the victim (Luke 10:34-35).

[5] For knowledge, cf. Mark 6:34; John 21:15-17; Acts 2:42; 2 Tim. 4:2. For guarding, cf. Acts 20:28-31; 1 Tim. 4:16. For leading, cf. 1 Thess. 5:12; Heb. 13:7. For modeling, cf. 1 Pet. 5:3; Heb. 13:7; 1 Cor. 11:1; Phil. 3:17.